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Oh, man, sometimes do you do stuff that makes you wonder? Lately that has become my M.O. Are there any other people out there shaking their head at themselves? 
This is how it usually begins for me. I’m sitting in a chair and doing stuff. Stuff for me usually contains a pen. All of a sudden I can’t find my pen. I look all over — on the floor, in the cushions, around everything I’m working on. I find no pen.
Then I decide I must not have had a pen. I must have imagined having a pen. That thought alone is crazy thinking. But when I can’t find it, I’m grasping. Yeah, that’s it. I must not have had a pen. It is amazing how we can believe things we tell ourselves, even when we know it is clearly crazy thinking.
Finally, I get up and go get a pen. I sit down and begin my stuff again. After a bit, I reach up, for some odd reason, and the lost pen is in my mouth. Yesiree-bob, all that time I was looking for the pen, it was hanging from my mouth. I kid you not. I’m so not proud of this!
I think that incident may beat looking for your glasses and finding them on your face. For some reason, having a pen hanging out of your mouth and not realizing it is there seems really wacko. Wacko — welcome to my new reality.
My Aunt is about to turn 90. The other day she called and told me about her wacko friend. She said, “Every time I talk to her, I ask her what she is doing and she replies, ‘I’m looking for something.’” (Mental note to self: I gotta meet this friend. Clearly we can relate to each other.)
As I talked with friends recently, they were all discussing ideas on how to decorate their car antennas to help find their cars in the Meijer parking lot. They said it has gotten harder, though. Apparently many now do this, so an added complication is having to remember how you decorated your antenna to distinguish yours from all the other decorated antennas. Geez, is nothing easy anymore? I do see the need for all this, though. I feel like a broken record when I walk out of Meijer and say, “Dang, where’d I park?” No one ever answers. The search begins and sometimes goes on quite awhile. More proof that nothing is easy anymore.
I tried to add a joke or two on this topic but none of them seemed funny anymore. Hmm.
When I go to the doctor, they tell me to remember three words. Then when the doc comes in, he’s supposed to see if I remember them. He usually forgets to ask. I have to remind him, “Don’t you want to know if I remember apple, penny, table?”
He never does.
My husband and I often chat. It, too, is often an ordeal. He says, “What did you say?” And of course, I have no idea. I really think I should only have to say it once. Isn’t that right? Isn’t there some rule on this?
There is an old saying by Bill Lyon, “If at first you don’t succeed, find out if the loser gets anything.” I wonder if he’s talking about losing stuff or just being a loser. I hope it’s losing stuff and maybe I’ll get lucky and win something for all the stuff I lose.
Colette (whoever she is) said, “You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.” OK, I am enthused. I am excited. I am pumped. Now where was that pen again?
